Tim Stevens over at Leading Smart wrote a great post about “These Top Church Lists Making Me Groan”. While I commented my thoughts on the topic I wanted to elaborate a little more on it and, in a way, post a personal confession to tie in the point.

Top Church Lists can be evil. They can cause division. They can cause pride, judgment, and pain. There really is no purpose other than our fleshly desires for having these lists.

I have talked with church planters who get down because they can’t be like one of the Top 10. Their focus becomes on what the world says is successful and not what God says is successful. I have seen creative church teams who have stressed “upping the ante” or raising the stakes with their creativity in order to top Granger or National Community Church in innovation (and I still think the Hooter’s Girls will make an appearance at a cutting-edge church because I know that some crazy team is going to test the limits). Some pastors beat themselves up because they can’t seem to be like “Super Church” who has 50,000 people and makes the cover of every Christian magazine.

One could say that it is our own fault for taking our own eyes off Jesus and losing true sight of what building the Kingdom really means. I would say this is true but if church leaders are saying that these comparisons and church lists aren’t important, then why on God’s green and blue earth do we need them? If we know that we should not compare ourselves by the world’s standards for what is successful, why do we have Christian publications and blogs that write as though we should or that encourages this behavior? Maybe it really is important…but to me these things will only set us up for failure when it comes to pride and focus.

I want to share a personal and painful confession: I long to be Number One! I want to be the guy who not only makes the list but dominates it.

I desire to be on the cover of Fast Company, Outreach Magazine, and Relevant. It eats me up because I know I am more talented than most people in my field. I despise it when a new guy who planted a fast growing church two years ago who mentioned “branding” as part of their success is now the brand guru who makes the Top 10 Lists and gets asked to speak at all the cool conferences on branding and church marketing – especially when I have been doing branding and church marketing way before it was a buzzword, and longer than some of you have been pastors. I am just being honest. I continually compare myself to other church branding or marketing firms. I look at the lists, the who’s who, the blogs who talk about who’s the stud and I beat myself up because I want to get through Seth Godin’s “Dip” and be the greatest. Some days I have considered selling my soul to be the brand celebrity.

God has become second because I want to be number one. I have lost my focus on being faithful with what He has given me and my focus on Him. It shouldn’t be that way but number 18 doesn’t get asked to speak, write, or get the sweet gigs like number one does. It isn’t cool to be 3,455,116 on Technorati. My pride and my selfish desires are keeping me from living a life of joy.

The great thing is that I am learning (and repenting) that God doesn’t care about Technorati or Google rankings and that my goal, my priority, and my focus is to make the Lord the Number One thing in ALL of my life. So I am trying to let go of the lists, blog rankings, and fleshly desires and just be content and faithful where God has me today. How about you? If you are struggling with what the world says is successful vs. what God sees as successful I am praying for you right now. Turn your eyes upon Jesus!

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