Sunday I was extremely compelled to jerk a teenage boy out of his seat and whip him into submission because he continued to drape his legs over the seats as though he was in a Lazy Boy recliner.  The whole service he continued to do this and be a huge distraction all the while his parents sat there and simply ignored his rude and unruly behavior.

Last week we had two couples behind us, probably in their sixties, who apparently had not had enough conversation the entire week and whose batteries had all expired in their bionic ears.  They loudly bantered most of the service.  I almost turned around and told them our kids acted better in church at eight years old than they were behaving that day and that God would soon have to protect them from my mighty backhand about to follow.

While I do need to seek forgiveness for my violent and reckless thoughts it just abhors me how rude America has become.

The best place to really observe this rudeness is in places like *Wal-Mart where hugely overweight people will roughly push you out of the way -instead of asking- to get to their Oreos or you get run down by Hillbillies driving their beat up, duct taped pick-up truck going the wrong way in the middle of parking lot section.

What happened to the days where people showed respect for the people around them?  Where are the days of just plain common sense?

I remember a time where young men opened doors for ladies and the elderly instead of letting them slam on them.  Or when you talked back to your parents you got properly corrected with a swift kick in the pants.  There were days where people weren’t so consumed with their selfish attitudes and acted kindly towards others around them.  You could actually make it through a church service without a cell phone ringing during prayer time!

Friends, we need MUST get back to a day where kindness and selflessness are the norm.  We must have a renewed attitude that great values and morals are highly regarded instead of looked down upon.  We must move from a rude and self-centered society to one of respect and giving.  If not, our nation really has no hope for the future.  It will be worse than it is now.

So maybe stun-guns should be legal to carry and use at our leisure…

*Wal-Mart is a nasty,hideous place where you go to pay for your bad karma on earth.  It should be avoided at all costs.

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I am going to take a huge risk and go way out on a limb.

A couple of my current comments on an article at Church Communications Pro regarding open source products or “freeware” got me thinking about a situation with churches I have encountered personally.  The situation has to do with some churches or their leaders that feel as though they should receive free stuff just for being a church or pastor.

I believe that there is nothing wrong with a church receiving any type of gift when a person wants to give it from the heart or in a worshipful response to God.  I do believe it is wrong for churches to expect or guilt people (knowingly or unknowingly) into giving to their church by using the “Kingdom building” excuse.

Let me share an example from my business life.

My professional work focuses on helping churches communicate their message.  I do this because I love God and want to give back with the talents He has blessed me with and am passionate about seeing the Church grow.  This is the way that I provide everything from a home to food to education for my family.  The Bible says “a worker deserves their wages” Luke 10:7.  The sad thing is that there have been so many churches during the last six years who have tried to get my services for free or for a huge discount because “I am a Christian and I should give to the Kingdom building movement.” This is absolutely wrong and not Biblical!

What some church leaders don’t seem to understand is that, like them, I too have had to pay my dues for education, training, expensive software, and computers. They forget this is how I feed my family and probably don’t know that there aren’t benefits like being on a church staff.  Sometimes I have to work when I am really sick and I don’t get yearly vacation times.  Please understand this is not a gripe about my choice and lifestyle but that there are many things in the background that can easily be forgotten.

This brings me to my comments at Church Communications Pro.

If a business charges for their services which take time, money, and experience, shouldn’t they have the right to earn a profit and make a living from their talents?  Is it right for a church to feel as though everything should be provided for free or at a discount?  Wouldn’t you feel horrible by taking the blessing from another person or food from a child’s mouth?  And to those wealthier churches who have played the “Kingdom” card – are you not sinning against the person or business by pretending to have no money?

I wish I could give it all away but my priority is providing for the people in my household – and it’s that way for other businesses and individuals too!  My hope is that churches will understand this and remember that no one can just work for free…unless you’re independently wealthy.

A worker deserves their wages and churches should be the first to willingly pay Christians who are using their hands to make a living instead of always giving to the people who refuse to work and expect a handout.

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I read this quote in Quiet Strength – The Principles, Practices, and Priorities of a Winning Life by Tony Dungy last night.

“Champions are champions not because they do anything extraordinary but because they do the ordinary things better than anyone else.” – Chuck Noll

Are you doing the ordinary things better than anyone else?

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I have to break from part two of my series on whether “Church Marketing is a Sin” to rant about how Christianity in America has become a highly lucrative business. Check out the current list of church conferences on the calendar this year (and this isn’t all of them):

• Healing Place Church Experience (have I ever said how sick I am of hearing the word experience and church together?)
• Unleash 2008
• Q (very short name I’d say but at least this looks like it actually has a bigger purpose)
• Orange: We hope you will join us this year for an authentic, dangerous and UNCENSORED experience! (Does this mean they’ll drop the F-Bomb?)
• Coast 2 Coast
• Externally Focused Conference: Transform your community. Transform your life. Hmmm…
• The White Board Sessions: You can get a whiteboard for under $20 at Staples.
  

PLUS, and I love this one…I can spend two days following the Senior Management Team of Granger Community Church for a cool $1,500.00 to get an inside look at how they do ministry. Are you really serious?!?

Please understand that I do not mean to sound harsh towards any of the people or their teams presenting at these conferences. I personally only know one presenter out of all of them (who has an ego the size of Texas) but I am sure that most of their hearts are for helping others build the Kingdom. I also ask Jesus for forgiveness in that this may not be the most Christ-like post or way to communicate my feeling about this topic. However my question is this:

Do we really need all these conferences to tell us how these leaders do their ministry or how to be effective at ours?

I don’t know whether it’s a conviction of the Spirit or common sense but it grieves me to think at how much money will be spent to attend and hear these speakers. I did some number crunching based off of an average on each conferences fees and the number of attendees they allow or “guestimate” based off the size or speakers at the event.

My very rough calculation = $2,185,940.00. That’s over two million dollars not including airfare, hotel, meals, and the “I was there” t-shirt.

Do we really need to spend over two million dollars to follow teams around for a day and watch how they interact with each other or to have churches who have been blessed with great growth tell us how “they” did it? Is it worth going to another conference to hear about another innovation, theory, or technique that may or may not work for our individual situation – or one that a church staff will never implement because they’re still working on the method from last year’s conference?

I know of many church planters who have been called to plant in their community who are doing a great work but are struggling because of financial support. I see people in my city who can’t afford a hot meal or warm place to sleep for one night. I know of single mothers who are working at least two jobs just to feed their children and keep the electricity on. I could mention the fact that some “on-fire” Christian leaders give more to buying conference tickets, books, and lattes than sending support to missionaries who look death in the eye every day for fulfilling the Great Commission.

I pray that church leaders, their teams, and congregations will wake up and realize that “the Church” has become just like corporate America. We have been blessed way beyond our dreams and we are now taking advantage of it. We talk of being missional yet some of us can’t even break beyond the missional motivation speech. Shame on us! American prosperity has definitely been a curse.

How about we spend more time in prayer, fasting, serving in our community, and listening to the hurt of others over spending more money on an expensive trip to tell us how we might do it and give it to better causes? And I point this to myself – an addicted lover of books and technology. Maybe it’s time to just go out and do it and learn for ourselves. After all, experience is the best teacher and Jesus Christ the best leader we could follow.

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This weekend I had a big flair up with a common chest pain that I have had on and off the last year but for some reason this time it just felt different.  I had also been feeling nauseous a lot and even though I look pregnant at times I am sure that this couldn’t be the case (unless of course I was abducted by aliens and made into an experiment).  So last night I did what most smart people do…I got on WebMD.com to make my own “professional” diagnosis.  The results came back as angina (which doesn’t sound manly at all) or heart attack.  I then did the next best thing I could think of: I went to sleep and decided to call a doctor for a visit this morning.

My appointment was scheduled for 3 p.m. but my chest starting hurting again and I got a really bad feeling. I called the doctor to see if I could get in ASAP and I was told to immediately go to the emergency room. Don’t finish my coffee, don’t do one more design, don’t make whoopee – get there now!!! And I can’t say that I didn’t contemplate whoopee. After all, I am a red-blooded male and figured what better way to die?

Two hours after being scanned, stuck, and hooked up up to a machine like a dead battery I emerged from the emergency room.  The report and tests all came back good and they think it was just a bad case of stress or anxiety.  While I don’t think I am stressed I am grateful to God that is wasn’t something worse. My dad died from a massive heart attack at age 51 and some of my mom’s family have been diagnosed with rare forms of cancer so naturally I was just a little cautious this time.

This whole situation isn’t a new reminder of just how precious life can be; I already know that and am thankful for every breath of every day! But it is a reminder. The hardest thing today was watching my children get upset and that hurt worse than the actual pain.

My goal of this post is not having a pity party for myself. No, this is about telling people how you never know what each day brings and that we must think of every day as our last. Material possessions, awards, job titles, money and bills – they don’t make a damn bit of difference in life.  As John Ortberg’s book title says, “When The Game Is Over, It ALL Goes Back in the Box!” The stuff that does matter and makes a difference is focusing on God, relationships, and loving others.

Please don’t wait before it’s too late to do what matters. Don’t put off being with your spouse, spending time with your kids or family, inviting a neighbor to lunch, visiting the forgotten elderly or sick, telling someone you’re sorry, or stopping just to be present with someone you love. Tomorrow might not come, but today you have every opportunity to do what matters!

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Discussing one’s view is great. I think that it is essential we debate on different topics and learn from others about the way they see things. But I do not agree when a Christian begins to get hateful or becomes self-righteous by attempting to throw Scripture at another so that they can “prove” they are right when there is no decisive way to “win”. For example, we can say that the Bible speaks clearly about Jesus being the Son of God and God in the flesh. There is no dispute in that. We can discuss the topic of speaking in tongues and agree to disagree that some believe it is a valid gift today and others who do not. This is a non-essential that can go either way.

What has really chapped my hide is that I have been involved in many blog posts where a devoted, hardcore Christian will respond with an air of superiority and pride – and do all they can to “thump” Scripture into the heathen’s head (believer or not) and whose only purpose is to prove their point as if God is awaiting their great spiritual victory. I am all for sharing correct teaching and Scripture. I think too many people have backed down from what they believe in, but there is a way to dialogue these beliefs in a way that isn’t condescending.

How we approach conversations is very important as Christians. This is one reason there is SO MUCH division in the Church today and why most non-Christians don’t want to even hear what we want to share. What do you think? Is “Bible Thumping” really and truly effective for today’s culture?

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I wonder if this is just something that hits on the human heart and it a great way to sell your blog, books, or speaking engagements.

What about the responsibilities that one has to provide for the family or needs of others? How do you chase something that you dream about doing (and have wanted to do for years) and keep juggling the balls you must juggle in the air? What do you do if you have more than one thing you want to do?

So do you do what you love despite the cost or outcome? Or do you settle for what you know and is the safe way to go?

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I realize that healthy growth is important for a church and that people should becoming devoted followers of Christ because our churches are obedient to Matthew 28:19-20, but some churches are starting to act like Fortune 500 companies. I read blogs every Monday and Friday to keep up with culture and church life. It is simply astonishing how numbers, name dropping, or egomania seems to be the topics of discussion as if it’s some type of trophy that church people and leaders should be striving for.

Is our calling or our mission really about who we are speaking with at the next “bigger than life” conference or how many people got saved as a result of our kick-butt message last Sunday? To me, and this is only my opinion, I feel this is not any different than the Pharisee’s in Jesus day. They were about the image and the show. What we need is more discussion about bringing unity to the Body of Believers and things that are more beneficial to the Kingdom.  Less of self, more of Jesus.

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How many times have we expected to get something for nothing because we are a pastor, a church, or a church planter? I’ve been guilty of this. If I called a plumber or bought a car, I secretly hoped for the “pastor’s special discount”. Sometimes I made sure the salesman knew I was a church planting pastor. After all, we are entitled to God’s blessings and freebies aren’t we? Well, not so fast.

Jesus said that a worker deserves their wages (Luke 10:7). So workers should be paid for the work that they do whether as an evangelist, a preacher, a plumber, or a car salesman. And is it possible to rob the worker of His blessing for him (such as supporting his family and providing for their needs) when we expect the church discount? Let me share Bob’s story.

Bob is a tent-maker who creates stuff for God’s glory. He serves churches through the gifts that God has blessed him with because he believes there is no greater cause than helping build the Kingdom. He also supports his family with his talents.

One of the churches, who can afford and wants his custom tents, feels that Bob should provide them with a sweet, fat discount because they too are doing God’s work. They are supposed to be great stewards of God’s money and they need a break so they can fulfill the Great Commission. If Bob can’t hook them up “on the cheap” they will have to go to Wal-Mart – even though they think Bob is the best tent-maker and really want his products.

Meanwhile Bob’s family is praying. His daughter needs braces immediately and his wife has medical problems that have been ongoing for years. But they can’t afford it because they don’t make enough money to pay it upfront and getting insurance as a self-employed tent-maker is almost impossible. And if Bob cuts off his hand while making that tent for a sweet discount, well, he’ll just have to bleed to death because with only life insurance – he can only afford to die. But that’s OK, at least the church wasn’t robbed of their blessing…

This story may seem a little silly but it is 100% true! You see, I am “Bob” and this has actually happened to me. It is my story and yet it is similar to other stories of designers I know.

Sometimes as churches we forget to see the other side of things. Yes, we all want great deals and to be good stewards of God’s money but sometimes spending God’s money for something that will build His Kingdom or to help His people is good stewardship.Matthew25:14-28. Sometimes it is easy for us to forget the risks, training and expenses one has in starting and running a business and we can only think “bottom dollar”. That’s why I started off this post by asking if you would give up your paycheck for a week. Will you give up your money that you earned by working hard? Will you give up the salary that pays for your utilities or your son’s medication?

I admit that I used to seek out the “pastoral discount” or chew down my mechanic’s price…but I don’t anymore not because I am special but because I have experienced the other side. It doesn’t feel right anymore.

There isn’t anything wrong with praying for God’s favor or for a sweet discount but let God orchestrate the deal and not ourselves.There have been times where the Holy Spirit told me not to charge my normal fees for a church or to accept payments – but it was His leading – and it was for churches that truly needed the help unbeknownst to me at the time.

Let me wrap up by saying these words in truth and love.

If you are a church who is next to broke or already there (and I know this feeling as a church planter) pray that God will lead you to the right answer or for His providence in a way that can only be done by His will. Don’t expect or assume you’ll get freebies and if you do remember to offer something in return as goodwill.

If you are a church or staff member who has the funding to pay a worker her wages – don’t nickel and dime her to get a deal. Don’t play the “you should give us the Christian sister” card or “we’re going to compare you with ABC” shtick for a discount. Don’t take advantage of someone’s living and then go to your smug suburban dwelling with professionally landscaped yards. It’s wrong in so many ways and I don’t believe it honors God. Please pay a worker their wages and don’t expect something for nothing.

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I was working on a project for a client at my office the other day when a friend stopped by and asked me what I am doing. “Well, I’m designing some slammin’ graphics for a new church that wants to reach people who have tattoos and body piercings – and the kind of people not normally found in a typical church”, I replied. And then it hit me like a speeding Mack truck that my buddy is the EXACT person this church wants to reach. I decided to engage him on his thoughts and feedback (and since he was a little curious why a church wanted to use a pic of tattooed people).

First I have to give a little background info on my friend. He has been burned by the hypocritical Christians. He sees through the facades and is leery of most Christian’s agendas. He doesn’t necessarily believe in God but he doesn’t disbelieve either. Yet he knows more Scripture than a lot of believers and understands Christianity – sort of. He would be a tough nut to crack so to speak but under the shell I believe (and know) that there is a guy, who if was on fire for the Lord, would change the world.

Some of the questions I asked were: what do you think of church marketing and what would engage/offend you, what pisses or turns you off about church, would you visit a church by seeing a postcard, and other stuff relating to church life, branding, and marketing. The following are his thoughts written as best as I can remember and they may be a little rough in thought. They are also very straightforward so please don’t get offended at some of the way the points are presented. Here’s his feedback.

• Be careful of what you say and how you say it. Don’t come across that you are better than him, cleaner than him, or perfect. If you do you can kiss his butt (I cleaned this one up).

• Don’t assume his life is screwed up and that you can fix it or make it better. He knows that he has problems but he also knows there are closet Christians who are gay, looking at porn, alcoholics, spouse abusers, and chronic liars. It is OK to say that we all have problems and are in this together – and lets deal with it together – but don’t act like you have a magical pill to make him “right.”

• Don’t try and impress him with a Disney World approach. I showed him some print samples of some very well known and popular churches in town. His thoughts were:

1. Quit trying to be like Disney World
2. Stop promising or communicating that you will have an “experience” and call it what it is…worship or church
3. What are you trying to sell him on? Are you after his money? Is this what his money would go to?
4. If you are going to tape or provide video feeds of your band and preacher, don’t bother asking him to visit. He’ll feel duped and cheated. He can watch the entertainment experience on TV at home.

• Marketing your church is fine. It’s OK to brand you church and send out marketing – you need to! But don’t send a postcard saying his kind of people are in your church and then not have those people there. He’ll tell you off.

• Pictures and graphics. You don’t necessarily have to show a punker or biker in order for him to look at it and relate. But like the point above – if you are portraying that kind of church and he visits and there are no bikers – he’s gonna tell you off. My friend suggested using pictures of real people; the fat, ugly, crooked teeth, crazy hair, not all together people. He gets turned off by propaganda that promotes just the pretty people that “have it all together”.

• Live it! If you are going to preach it, communicate it, talk about it – you need to live it.

All in all he is not offended if people tell him about Christ, their church, or their beliefs. Just don’t try and cram it down his throat and walk away with a salvation number under your belt. He doesn’t get angry about churches marketing themselves. Just try and be real and don’t sell him on your product like the rest of the world.

I could go on about our conversation but it would be a book. I definitely learned from one person’s angle and perspective – and how to improve what I can do as a branding dude as well as a church planter.

I hope that this post will spark conversation and to help us think through our church marketing and church branding efforts to reach people like my friend more effectively. I also encourage you to engage the people in your community on their thoughts and input as well. It’s one thing to read a study provided by George Barna but it’s another thing to get in the ring and find out some of the answers for ourselves.

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This post was originally written over at ‘The Shed’ but felt that it might may be more beneficial to repost here. – James

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